cannot express..

i dont know what to say right now..happy??maybe..but a little hurt...he's going to be married next year..im happy to hear that..but..what about my feeling?? still cannot express da real feeling...what i can said to him is..congratulation..then when i asked him who is da lucky girl..he said..ada lar...ok kot for him..n when me fkir blik, patut ke me jmpe n going out with him mase me when to penang nnti?? nnti ape kate future wife die?? knpe die xnk bgtau aku sape bakal isteri die ek?? bkn ssh pn..n aku xknl pn pmpn tu.. mjlis kawin die pn..mybe aku xg kot...sory papa..me can't make it...

down again...

down again.. my hi's result was very bad...tp kali ni memang expected..cz my prctcl exm mmg truk..xleh buat..me cant say anything..tu lar..ambk mdh sgt dat sbject..
bajet pandai lar mizah??! pdn mke! menyesal skrg pn xgne dh...

artherosclerosis...

sumone said...mizah! rmpas blik pkwe ko..pkwe ko tu..ko syg die kan...n then me said...ko lar kwn baik aku...BANGANG PYE IDEA! what can i said anymore for dat stupid idea..beb! me cant do dat lar...xsmpai ati...mcm bruk siku pn ade..dh bg, nk ambik balik plak..ape kes??! kalu aku wat cm tu kt ko, ko mrh x?? bkn stkt mrh je, siap smpan dendam lagi nk bnuh aku..hahaha..me knew u better ar babe! i cant really said bout dat person..but sumtime me miss him..even rite now i have my papa pingu, puteh, mama n fmly but still i need him..sumtime me rase nk je call die cm dlu2..but mcm xptut plak wat cmtu...bkn mcm, MEMANG TAK PATUT! dh lame me xjmpe die..mls lar weyh..xd mood...hahahha..really breaking heart..hahaha...jangan pandang belakang..huhuh...




weyh! how's bout our plan?? holi2day d penang n kedah..hahha..me cant wait for it... to my dearest...., sory babe. cant join ur family day...me got a giler idea to do wif my kmpp's fren..huhuhuhu.. send my lot of kiss n hugs to our baby k..n ur mum too...really2 cant join all of u..n really2 sory for dat...iloveuguystothelimit...my kmpp's fren...kte nk p mane nnti??? da most important place yg we must go.. of crse lar KMPP..meet our mummy there n my papa pingu also..too much miss them...then aku nk ajk pkcik tu p main boling skali bleh???huhuh..saje nk spent time ngn die..ni plan aku je lar..da next day, kte p island..hahah..wajib pergi ke penang hill...nak naik cable car!! da other days..korang pkir lar plak...byk bende lg aku nk kne pkir ni..huhuhu..meet2 there ok?

u got what u'd done..

i dont really know where i should start this post..from where i got da strength to post diz..even right now im very down..i think everyone knew why im feeling dat way..only 2 things dat will make im down...first of all, what i can say is ALHAMDULILLAH..Im not "fail"..but most of the result dat were came out really make me very upset..too sdeyh with da results..i dont think i can make it anymore..mama...abah.. im so sorry...please..dont get angry with me...i dont know whats wrong with dat..i study very hard..but da results like not on my side..its very unfair! no! i should not said diz..ya Allah..please forgive me...sy terlalu hina for saying dat it was unfair...i dont have da right to say dat..but..what can i say anymore..da results was too cruel for me!!! i cant accept dat!! is that my fault??? di mana silapnye??? please help me to find dat!!! i cant stay like diz...i need to find dat and try to improve it to the better level..adakah aku riak??? ya allah..di mane keriakannya??tjukkan padaku... mybe aku tidak menyedarinya..or maybe i dont know it was a riak..tolong tunjukkan padaku..ineeditsotothelimit... n right now, im juz felt dat my life was meaningless...cant make my family proud of me...papa...i need u right now...i cant handle it by myself..terlalu sdeyh to think bout diz..where are u papa???

here! here! here!

here!here!here!

ah! not this papa...


but my papa pingu... where are u???

lacrimal gland to the lacrimal duct...

dont know what to say actlly...many stories which are lawak..hahahha...bengong..( dont know what expression,sumone plz help me to express dat feeling:)),,sedih..wuuuuu...3 in 1...
me juz had my first ospe..anatomy ospe..dat questions really killed me! i think can count lar how many i can answer it properly..i mean cnfm btul la..huhu..almost stations yg me xleh jwb were by .....me cant really said his name..takut kene saman..hhuhuhu...memang giler la...ape pye soalan daa..xd pun dlm lctre die..bleh gler kalu gni..next week, im goin' to have lab science's ospe plak..before da real final exam.hope i can handle my life..to my family..im sorry if i cant make it as what u'd expected.. but i promise dis is my first n last...i'll study more harder for the next sem..rite now,im studying lab science..huhuhu..(still hve time to make a post,,huhuhu)

after dat ospe..we went to the harmoni cafe..eatin'2..i'm lovin' it! hahaha..me n kak mkn nsik aym..yan chicken chop( my fvrte!)..huhuh..and today..me wear bju kurung...da maroon one..huhuh..again...huhuhu..then..on the way to kb mall..me trsrmpak ngn izat...hahah...xbleh blah lar! trus me glak when i saw him..hahahah..xleh nk thn..bcoz of him, me wearing dat bju kurung..n serte merta he said,"bru nmpak hari ni"...huhuhu..only me n him know what's da meaning of dat sentence..huhuhu..me juz nodded da head..n blah..huhuhu..malu lar..n dlm kete me gelak puas2...hahahahahahahhahahahh....yan n kak pun geleng kepala..i cant see u lar izat..nk gelak je..hahahaha
i dont know whether i should say diz or not...but my heart say i should...even i know dat..it cant make da problem settled..i juz want to confess sumthing yg maybe make sumone's heart is hurting...first of all..im sorry..i really dont know if what i'd done will make my life as well as his life going to be ruined..dat pic..was not da real pic..what u got, is not as what u think..me juz want to know whether what had u said is true or not,,so i juz gave any pic to u to make u believe it dat i can happy even not with u..but i really dont get it..y u just got not in mood??i think it will make u happy..please...understand me...dat pic was not da real pic..i cant continously lie to u..it will make me..xsng duduk..always thinking of u...if u happy,juz say it...if not, PLEASE MAKE IT CLEAR...I REALLY NEED IT!!!

aku bernafsu!

lately, me sgt bernafsu! nafsu to eat..even me in fasting but still wanna eat everything..waa!!! byk mkn maaaa!! kfc,mcd,pizza hut, nasi kukus, chicken chop and so on make me feel wilt..me want them!!!! n when me call my mum n story to her bout diz, she said,mkn bace bismillah x????n me stop! me bace bismillah x???lupe ar..rse mcm bace je.. alrdy know dat it was my habit to baca bismillah first before doin' anything.. juz kalu nk tutt je , me xbace lar..hahaha.. yesterday n today..me xmkn....mlm bru me strt brkfst..hahah..n when me talked diz to my pingu, mmg kne lctre hbis ar..kne lctre bout mkn2 ni.. pdn muke! sape suh bgtau??! damn it! they doesnt know, me bernafsu to eat sumthing else.. i dont know what is it but when i ate, i still feel not fulled yet..xtau nk mkn ape lagi.. too afraid if i eat so much thing, i'll obese! me dont like it!!! rite now my weight is stable..around 38kg.. not underweight but ideal..hahaha..n also rite now, me really feel to eat mcd.. should i call 1300131300???hello! please send me mc chicken meal 1 set to desasiswa nurani,usm kk..asap ok??? should i??? dont lar..juz wait yan get back lar..she's goin' to buy sumthing..huhuhu..eat2 more okay?!

LatissIMUs DOrsi..

me should more advance bout diz..should detect it earlier..but i still dont understand why we should be like diz..i wonder why diz happen to me..i ask everyone, why?? n sometimes me thought dat it was not fair for me to continue it.. me have my own decision.. y dont i just follow my decision?? i dont wanna think about my previous story... now, my story will be more difficult..more like harry potter's movie..i need someone to help me...but is it ok?? for me to let sumone help me in my life?? i mean handling my life.. even my mum said, u should think it by urself.. u're almost 19.. do ur own decision...but i dont think i can make it.... me are now going to have some test..life test,frenz test n even my final exam.. my life goin' to be more difficult..n i need to beware wif diz.. family,redha,fatin,waniex, n puteh are my power's topup along my life..love them so much!

nOT ur BAby ANyMore!

That's da point!
me not ur baby anymore!
don't u get that??!
and don't ever call me like dat!
me hate dat!
what the hack with u??
n juz get lost from my mind!
i dont wanna share any memories with u anymore..
juz pretend dat we never know each other.....
i have my life
as well as u..
juz go ahead wif dat..
don't ever try to take care of me..
u'd decide diz..
n i will accept it..
its too cruel for me
to hear what have u said!
n too hard to accept dat!
so dis is da end of our story.
fullstop!

y should be like diz??!

Dat case is not settle yet..xtau lar ble nk hbis..too much persoalan among us..y we need to havoc2 bout dat case..dh mhkamah tetapkan dat she will be caned..n sebat tu i dont think it will be da persoalan..dh byk ulama' discussed bout diz..dat diz sebat is not like da mahkamh sivil pye sebat..diz is syariah..both are not same..most of us ingat, syariah pye sebat like sivil ke??? Islam dh menetapkan cara-cara menyebat mengikut islam..n dat's mean islam xkejam! langsung tidak menyalahi hak asasi manusia.. diz sebat juz for mengajar da others, supaya xikut melakukan kesalahan tersebut..kenapa nak bantah lagi??? n kenapa tetiba u point up to mansuhkan hukuman sebat?? sebat is one of the hukuman in Islam.. if we hapuskan diz sebat, dat's mean like kite nak mengubah hukum Allah.perlu ke begitu?? u should learn more bout Islam before pointing up sumthing yang agak ridiculous n try to understand it..im not saying dat im know everything bout Islam as im also in learning..as a muslim, we need to continuosly learn bout islam..Islam itu luas..everything yang islam dh tetapkan untuk kite, it is da best for us..segala jenis hukuman dalam islam, there is sumthing yg baik for us..nobody don't have the right to deny it..

peLIk Bin AJaiB

wht's wrong wif him?? i still dont really understand bout him..i thought i 'know' him, but still sumtime he made me felt curious bout him..i wonder bout his feeling..yeah..maybe die sht secara luarannya..but dalamannya??very pening to think bout diz...tp..i nk fkir jgak!!!when i talk to him bout my "pertunangan"die mcm terkejut gler! ye..sume org akan terkejut bout my terburu2 pye keputusan tu..tp die mcm xleh tmer hakikat je...mcm nk msg pn sdeyh..tp ble i said dat "pertunangan" is just a joke, bru lar i felt that i am messaging wif him..kalu x, rase cm msg ngn org lain je...ble i sbut sal tunang je, msti die jadi mcm org lain...y??xmgkin die still felt dat feeling??die jgk yg nk aku change my feeling towrds him..dei pye perubahan tu sgt ketara n aku rase cm nk tye je..tp kalu aku tye pun, die msti bg jwapan negatif pye kt aku...n semalam, when i talk bout a ..., n i mtk chnge ngn die,die tye dh ade ke?? i ckp lar otw.. sumone nk blikan..sje je nk tgk die cmne..ble ckp cmtu je, die glak pun mcm buat2 je..n tye sape org tu?? n i continue my plan ( to test him)...i said..ade lar...sampai mase nnti sy bgtau...huhuhu...n then trus die ckp, xpe lar..nk tdo dh,esk kje...gudnit,tke care,bye..strght cmtu je...xsbut pn pglln mnja aku ngn die..strght cmtu je lar sbjik2..makin aku fkir, mkin pening plak rasenye..kalu betul die still ade dat feeling, knp xckp je??? aku pn still xleh buang perasaan tu...ntah lar..xpyh fkir dh lar