it is not a story but...

some stories dont have

a clear beginning, middle, and end.

life is about not knowing, have to change,

taking the moment and making the best of it,

without knowing what's going to happen next

we may not be as happy as you always dreamed,

we would be...

but for the first time,

lets just allow ourselves

to be whatever it is we are

and that will be better, ok??

i think that will be better...

but actually..........

as easily as you..

wAkE Up!!!

holding on is tough,

much tougher than letting it go

or simply quitting

me finish up each day

and be done with it.

you have done

with what you could.

some blunders and absurdities

have crept in.

forget all of them

as soon as you can

tomorrow is a new day.

you shall begin it serenely

and with too high a spirit

to be encumbered

with your old nonsense!

just because me come off strong,

doesn't mean there's nothing wrong!

someone has told me..

be fair to yourself

don't cry for someone

who doesn't deserve your tears!

there's no use holding on to somebody

who has been hurting you..

learn to keep a little for yourself...

thanz yok!

loveutoomuchdude!!!!!

p/s : berjiwang2 is not good during exm fever! urggh!!

behind me...

i've emerged from the dark place

i've been inhabiting for some time

i've stepped out

Into

the light

Hard times???

i'm sure they are not over...

Is it true that times will heal all things??

or it is just a probability??

Most likely not

But it is, for certain, a component

My wounds are closing

Infection and all

Even a young child will learn

Not to play in rosebushes

After he's been thrashed by thorns

So like a girl like me

I'll learn from the mistakes

Collect myself and cleans my core

Continue looking towards the Light

And leave the dark where it belong..

Behind me...

stop looking!

now i understand evrything...i have been looking for it..almost to die..how tank of tears me spend it for u...searching for da main causes..n at last i know everything..why there is a need for u to hide it..n force me to find it myself..why dont u said it to me by yourself??? please... be a gentleman...kenapa perlu diam seribu kata??? kenapa perlu menyakitkan hati orang even at the first you already said that u will never do it..please!! i dont need a promise! so now...what are you expecting from me to do right now??? happy on it?? or u wanna me to wish congratz?? okeyh! u got it.. CONGRATZ!! frankly speaking..I'M SPEECHLESS! thanz to everything..anda telah mencorakkan everything to agree with da statement dat i've said to you before..a statement dat almost mke us huru hara...a lot of thanz sbb senyap sepi tanpa berita...make me realising dat i can be myself...no need to worry...ur name will be gonna banned in my life..sekian terime kasih..:)

my cmplicated life....

argh!!! kepala dh berat berpusing..need an aspirin..not da panadol..but something dat will kill myslf too..i think...huhu..i cant live like dis...me should think it first before doin' anything..so dat i'll never make da same mistake as i make it juz now..yesterday...a bad day...y must us??? to cover urself from being exposed n to show dat u're work hard for dat but we juz like main2...hello???!!! its useless ar beb! what had happen..we're redha..but y u should blame us??? weyh, no point lar beb! ur point very rdiculous! xmsuk akal! we should blame u...but its otherwise..pening sgt!! dunia berputar ke tidak nieyh??? mybe terlalu kuat smpai bleh pening kot..mybe..huhuhu...frust pun ade..but me dont wnna concern it sgt...pnat dh..now??? me xtau bout myself..me xsure for myself or otherwise?? yeah..me admit it..me strted diz problem..but when i wnna stel it,, u ikut kpla u je...ape???! u igt me should ikt kpala otk u je ke??? me xd kpala otk??? ok fine! rght now me ikt kpla otk u..next, if i did sumthing stupidest to u, or me juz ikt my kpala otak for whtever..dont blame me..u decide it! me xnk gdo2..so me ikut je..do whtevr u wnna do.. damn it! oh god! y my life should goin' cmplcted like diz??? argh!!! me hate it! as what papa said...u must change it by ur own..juz take it ezy..n alwys remebr dat, me bhind on u...thanz for da nice advce pa...luvutothelimit!

should i compromise???

what should i do rite now???

continue my plan??

or

should i be meltz again??

i dunno

wht's da best action for me

to take...

i cant stand with diz anymore

i need my life back..

life without

worrying bout sumthing stupidest..

i've never seen

anyone like him

never!

n i talked diz

to his fren

about my plan..

n he ask me

to think it more

deeply more

i think..

mybe he'll think me..

what a cruel girl!

but

i didn't worried it anymore

he said..

he'll support me..

support me???

a girl dat he didnt know at all..

juz know from facebook..

are u sure??

n of crse i think

u'll support ur fren more...

i dont think

there is a correction

to be done

what had he said..

make me think twice..

should i compromise again???

but

i scared..

he'll never use this chnce properly..

like the other chances

dat i gave before..

oh god..

plz help me

to find out

whats da best for me....

today is sunday..huahua

aku xtau what is da main point for diz post..yang aku tau..tangan ku tengah menggatal hendak menari2 di ats keyboard ini...ku hrp..ku tidak melalut terlalu banyak..hahahah...

first of all..ALHAMDULILLAH..my exam goin' to the end...even i really dont know what will happen to my result...hopefully everything is ok..juz now i finished da lab science's paper..da questions are not hard but it juz becoz me xhfal..juz bace je..dats y byak yang me xleh jawa..ok..dont talk bout dat again..hahahah..right now, juz fikir nak balik..hahaha..

after dat exam, me p mkn d harmoni cafe..ngn yan n ezat..n yanti..huhuu..xleh blah! me jpe izat!!! huhuh..dari jauh me dh nmpak die..mle2 depa nk duk kt sblah mejaku..dlm hati aku,"izat...p la makan kt lain..malu ar aku klu ko mkn kat situ..huhuhu..p la cari tmpat lain.." bagaikan tuhan mendengar ape yang aku doakan...depa terus pndah masuk dlm cafe..hahah..alhamdulillah..slmt hdup aku..hahahha..lpas mkn..kami kuar..mle2 p tesco..xbli ape pn..da main point aku kuar is..nk crik kotak..to pack my things..tp xjpe pn..( bdoh kan..p cari kotak buruk kt tesco..xleh blah! hahahah)..then yanti suggestkn us to p PCB, mkan sotong celup..woww!!! ni pluang baek pye!! dh lame xmkn sotong..huhuhu..p la PCB..air tgh pasang mase tu..syok!! ezat! laen kali kte lagi ek..huhuh...tp ksian kt yan..die asyik nk mntah je..pning..sbb jln die same cm jln nk balik perak...kate yan...huhh..then lpas balik tu..ku xlrt yg teramat lar sgt..lpas kmas bju2 dlm bagasi, trus aku membungkangkn dri ku..xlrat weyh...bgun2, dh kul 8..nsb baek period..hahah..p mandi sat..then..nk wat pe ek???kotak xd lagi ni..mmpus aku! xsgup ku nk byar free2 rm81 kt nurani..huhuhu..pastu p blik yan.."yan...aku lapaq..." yan pn kbtlan nk p mkn..aku un join skli ar..huhuhu..lpas siap bgkus mknan, p 7e sat..tibe2 ku trnmpak sumthing yang mengexctd kan dri ku..seolah2 ke telah mencapai threshold level..utk ku generate action potential..(knp tbe2 je ade physio plak nieyh???huhuu..)ape lagi..KOTAK ar..huhuhu..ku semakin teruja..mle2 yan nk tye cashier 7e tu..tp ble fkir blik, die dh ltak kt tong smpah..mknanye die nk buang ar tu..kalu aku ambik tnpa bilang sama die, aku xdikire mencurik kan??kan2?? pe lagi..balun sume kotak yang ade..hahah..teruja2..balik bilik terus mkn( pnting tu..) bru packing barang..huhuhu..alhmdulillah..dh setel bab ni... thanz god!

y??? ade aku kisah ke ko nk kawin??ade aku kisah??? ko nak wat pe pn skrg, aku dh xksh dah..hdup ku happy without u..dlu mmg aku xleh timer bile xcntct skjp..tp skrg??? xcntct langsung pun aku lg suke..xyah ambik tau hal aku..aku tau jage dri aku..jga kesihatan aku...xyah nk sbuk2 kan dri..ari bhagia ko, bkn ari bahagia aku..so aku xkn pegi to celebrate it..lantak la orang nk ckp aku ape pn..aku xksh dh..org xfham aku..nk aku je yg faham depa..blah ar weyh..bru sekarang aku rase, mcmane kebodohan redha alami..hahahha..ku alaminye skrang weyh..huhuhu.. tp recording drama bi wat aku back to da normal again..too much miss them..n aku msg izat.."xleh blah ar weyh..rase nk glak je tgk drama bi kite..ko pye lakonan mmg superb ar..hahah..lawak giler.." byk lagi ar kami msg lpas tu..tp secret ar..hahahha...terlalu bahagia dgn drama trsbut,..fullamak! hahahha

kebosanan tahap maksimum~!!!

ari ni xd kje yang teramat lar sangat..

bgun tido dh kul 7.15...

tu pun emy yang kejutkan...

wawawawaw...

lpas siap smyang ape sume..

terus study..

tjuk hybridization..

first time..

aku faham dat tajuk...

before diz

aku setakat bace je...

xfhm??

lantak ar tu

hahahahh

then..

aku htar msg kt min..

"Min! nk g makan kul bape???

then min reply..

kul 11 lbih ar..

aku smbung study skit..

terus tido..

ngantuk..

semalam gayut ngn redha

lame jagk..

pnjang giler borak..

memang gelak giler2 ar..

die dh berkenan kat org jepun..

hahahahaha

xpe2..

mase makan td..

aku sempat lagi

sembang2 ngn family bahagia..

hahah

cik syikin, cik min, n cik dali..

wawawaw

lar ni pun

duk melepak lagi

kt blik cik syikin...

xtau ar

ble nak balik bilik..

huhuh

xpe

jp lagi aku balik study..

heheheheh

chow chin chow.....

cannot express..

i dont know what to say right now..happy??maybe..but a little hurt...he's going to be married next year..im happy to hear that..but..what about my feeling?? still cannot express da real feeling...what i can said to him is..congratulation..then when i asked him who is da lucky girl..he said..ada lar...ok kot for him..n when me fkir blik, patut ke me jmpe n going out with him mase me when to penang nnti?? nnti ape kate future wife die?? knpe die xnk bgtau aku sape bakal isteri die ek?? bkn ssh pn..n aku xknl pn pmpn tu.. mjlis kawin die pn..mybe aku xg kot...sory papa..me can't make it...

artherosclerosis...

sumone said...mizah! rmpas blik pkwe ko..pkwe ko tu..ko syg die kan...n then me said...ko lar kwn baik aku...BANGANG PYE IDEA! what can i said anymore for dat stupid idea..beb! me cant do dat lar...xsmpai ati...mcm bruk siku pn ade..dh bg, nk ambik balik plak..ape kes??! kalu aku wat cm tu kt ko, ko mrh x?? bkn stkt mrh je, siap smpan dendam lagi nk bnuh aku..hahaha..me knew u better ar babe! i cant really said bout dat person..but sumtime me miss him..even rite now i have my papa pingu, puteh, mama n fmly but still i need him..sumtime me rase nk je call die cm dlu2..but mcm xptut plak wat cmtu...bkn mcm, MEMANG TAK PATUT! dh lame me xjmpe die..mls lar weyh..xd mood...hahahha..really breaking heart..hahaha...jangan pandang belakang..huhuh...




weyh! how's bout our plan?? holi2day d penang n kedah..hahha..me cant wait for it... to my dearest...., sory babe. cant join ur family day...me got a giler idea to do wif my kmpp's fren..huhuhuhu.. send my lot of kiss n hugs to our baby k..n ur mum too...really2 cant join all of u..n really2 sory for dat...iloveuguystothelimit...my kmpp's fren...kte nk p mane nnti??? da most important place yg we must go.. of crse lar KMPP..meet our mummy there n my papa pingu also..too much miss them...then aku nk ajk pkcik tu p main boling skali bleh???huhuh..saje nk spent time ngn die..ni plan aku je lar..da next day, kte p island..hahah..wajib pergi ke penang hill...nak naik cable car!! da other days..korang pkir lar plak...byk bende lg aku nk kne pkir ni..huhuhu..meet2 there ok?

peLIk Bin AJaiB

wht's wrong wif him?? i still dont really understand bout him..i thought i 'know' him, but still sumtime he made me felt curious bout him..i wonder bout his feeling..yeah..maybe die sht secara luarannya..but dalamannya??very pening to think bout diz...tp..i nk fkir jgak!!!when i talk to him bout my "pertunangan"die mcm terkejut gler! ye..sume org akan terkejut bout my terburu2 pye keputusan tu..tp die mcm xleh tmer hakikat je...mcm nk msg pn sdeyh..tp ble i said dat "pertunangan" is just a joke, bru lar i felt that i am messaging wif him..kalu x, rase cm msg ngn org lain je...ble i sbut sal tunang je, msti die jadi mcm org lain...y??xmgkin die still felt dat feeling??die jgk yg nk aku change my feeling towrds him..dei pye perubahan tu sgt ketara n aku rase cm nk tye je..tp kalu aku tye pun, die msti bg jwapan negatif pye kt aku...n semalam, when i talk bout a ..., n i mtk chnge ngn die,die tye dh ade ke?? i ckp lar otw.. sumone nk blikan..sje je nk tgk die cmne..ble ckp cmtu je, die glak pun mcm buat2 je..n tye sape org tu?? n i continue my plan ( to test him)...i said..ade lar...sampai mase nnti sy bgtau...huhuhu...n then trus die ckp, xpe lar..nk tdo dh,esk kje...gudnit,tke care,bye..strght cmtu je...xsbut pn pglln mnja aku ngn die..strght cmtu je lar sbjik2..makin aku fkir, mkin pening plak rasenye..kalu betul die still ade dat feeling, knp xckp je??? aku pn still xleh buang perasaan tu...ntah lar..xpyh fkir dh lar

posts...

lately my post alwayz bout him...

it's becoz me misz him so much..

very2 misz him..

walau cmne pun

min or nina nk mrh

n suh me forget him..

i still cnt forget him

sorry...:(

before diz..

i thought

der will no man

dat can replace amir..

even i cpled wit sumone else after him..

he still not good enough

as amir to me..

even he's very kind

and love me so much...

but still can't make me forget amir..

and diz..

make my frenz worried bout me

they want me to forget amir..

but

everything was changed

after i met my PINGU

he made me felt happy..

always happy..

like amir did before..

and smtime

i forgot bout amir..

he changed my life..

n becoz of dat..

me misz him so much rite now..

n i don't think

der is any other man

dat can replace him...

.