melayang-layang...

Lately, me slalu fkir yg bkan2..sgt mengarut..i don't know why..but maybe i just want to prepare myself if it happens to me..but when me terus terusan memikirkan about dat thing, me don't think dat i can face it better..what in my mind right now?? of course bout my parents.. too much love them..i don't say dat org lain xsyg dorang pye parents. but what is da best word dat i need to use to show my love to them??? i can't really said it..but too much think bout diz, made me cried... i don't think i can live without them..yeah..org lain pun mcm tu jgk..but now we talk bout myself! macamane nk hidup without mama n abah??? terlalu bergantung hidup dengan mereke..seminggu skali, kalu xcall im going to be crazy..sometimes my mama said,"call wat pe nye,xd pe nk ckp pn..membazir je.." but da reality is im too much miss them...me always think, kalu one of them xde, how's bout me?? adik beradik yang lain??? i still remembered, when ayh fatin meninggal, i juz could only said..SABAR..but i don't think if it is happen to me, da word will made me tenang..im going to be crazy!!!! memang lumrah, stiap yang hidup pasti akan mati..bile tgk or baca kat paper, yg lagi muda dari mama n abah, meninggal dunia, make me think...one day, they will go too..but what can i said right now, i'm not mentally prepared...xtau nak buat macamane skrg wit my life..n always in my doa,

Ya Allah,

aku memohon

perkenankanlah doaku yg satu ini,

agar aku bahagia seumur hidupku

tanpa rasa penyesalan di hati

Kau matikan lah aku

sebelum Engkau

mematikan ibu bapa ku

agar aku tidak berada di dalam kekecewaan

di kemudian hari

Matikanlah kami di dalam iman

hanya itu permintaanku

mohon perlindungan dariMu ke atas keluargaku

amin...

Keterlaluankah doa ini?? pentingkan diri sendiri kah aku ini???